Online Dating Project: Responding to Emails

It’s Friday night so I run the risk of seeming totally lame by responding to emails right now. This is something I’m determined to measure – if I use the same responses on a Friday night versus a week night, am I less likely to get a response? Is being perceived as weekend plan-less a deterrent to the average online dater?

I’ve received 12 emails since I made my profile active around 11:30 last night, and I’m having a pretty good time wading through trying to find the best and worst messages. The good ones usually take time, but finding the worst takes diligence.

Almost every message I’ve received starts with: “I like your profile.”

I’m 99% sure this means I like your pictures, because there’s no way a profile as devoid of personality as mine would merit that opening comment. Anyway, after a bit of reading, wanting to stop reading, and making myself read some more, I finally found the worst of the evening.

His message was a fairly normal hello, but his profile… oh man.

Here’s an excerpt:

The Most Interesting Man in the WorldI’ve been expecting you… -I share the same birthday as G.W. Bush, 50 Cent, and the Dalai Lama, and I’m a combination of all three of them -When life gives me lemons, I make champagne -The next sentence is false. The previous sentence is true. -One hour of conversation with me is like four years of college -I can spin pillows on my finger and throw knives -I am a great poker

I respond to his message and immediately after hitting send am recommended three new matches – one of those is my ex-boyfriend. I’m pretty upset with Match at this point. Really, Match? Is this what I’m paying you for? I thought I am paying for HOPE and all you’re giving me is DESPAIR.

And then I realized the heading above my matches:

“Check out these members like [the one you just emailed].”

To sum it up – compared the profile of someone I dated to the worst profile I could find.

Maybe I’ve only been looking at the pictures


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